Anyone can be hugely successful right now, even without a winning mindset. But there is a catch: there is almost certainly no genuine happiness in achieving success this way. April Shprintz explains why this sucks and what you can do about it.
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Why Success Without A Winning Mindset Sucks
I am so glad you’re here. I’m going to talk about something that can be amazing to realize and speed up how you get to where you want to go. It can also be a little disconcerting because I’m going to tell you why. You could be hugely successful without actually having a winning mindset, yet that huge success will suck.
When you think about everything that you want in life, every goal you have, everything you desire, everything you’re driven to pursue, it all actually comes down to a way that you want to feel. Meaning if you want something, you actually want the feeling that that’s going to bring you and what it’s going to be like to experience that more so than you want the actual thing. I’ll give you a couple of examples.
One, when I was a young child and we were very poor, I always had the feeling that I wanted money until money didn’t matter. Actually, what it was, I didn’t want to be afraid of what would happen or what we couldn’t do because we didn’t have money. The other side of that is that I wanted to be safe. Safe, if you go down to it, is something that you want to feel so that you can feel happiness.
Winning Mindset: Safety is something you want to feel so that you can feel happiness.
No matter what you’re going for, it is about a feeling you want to get to. You can figure out what that feeling is by asking yourself, “What will I have, do or be when I have,” whatever the thing is. You keep asking yourself over and over until you get to the feeling part. No matter what it is, it is always going to ultimately come down to three things that people are in search of, and that is happiness. Some people will say peace, but they mean happiness. They’re fairly similar. Also, health and love.
It’s interesting because money’s not on there. The reason is because money is a tool that people use either to become more happy or to ensure the happiness of those around them. Money itself doesn’t even give you any of those feelings that you might want. There’s good news, and there’s news that some folks might find a little disturbing.
The good news is that you can find a way to feel any of the feelings that you think things are going to bring you right now, whether it’s happiness, excitement, or companionship. If you find ways to feel it now, then all the goals you’re looking for come to you even more quickly, and they come to you more quickly for two reasons.
Winning Mindset: If you find ways to feel happiness now, all the goals you are looking for will come to you even more quickly.
Number one, it’s that whole thing about how time goes by faster when you’re doing something you enjoy. It’s those days that you’re working on a project at work that you love with people that you enjoy being around. You look at the clock at one time and it’s 9:00 in the morning and you look at it again and it’s either lunch or 3:00 PM or whenever it is. You’re like, “That went by so fast,” versus when you’re doing something you can’t stand, or maybe you’re around people you don’t want to be, and it feels like every minute is an hour. That’s part of why it’s faster.
The other reason that it’s faster is because you are always going to get more of what you focus on. If you are focusing on that feeling that your goal ultimately brings you, you are going to notice more opportunities to feel that feeling even more. That is going to allow you to get to that goal faster. Now, we’re going to move on to the potentially disturbing news. It might be disturbing at first, but as soon as you understand it, this too will empower you to get what you want more quickly.
If you focus on the feeling that your goal ultimately brings, you will notice more opportunities to feel that feeling even more and get you to your goal faster. Click To TweetThe thing is this. If you don’t ever feel the feeling that you’re searching for now, getting that thing you want is not going to make you feel the feeling. For example, someone who thinks, “If I become a rich and famous actor, I’ll have love in my life.” The thing is, if you don’t ever feel love now, you are not going to feel love from becoming rich and famous. It’s actually going to be disappointing because then you won’t have the love and you’ll also be disappointed because you will have lost the hope that there is a way that you can get that love. Whatever you’re going for, the feeling you want, you’ve got to search for ways that you can feel that feeling right now.
You might say, “April, I don’t believe you.” Okay, let me give you an example. You have felt the feeling of getting the thing you want and not getting the feeling before. You got the gold star, but you felt empty. You won the race and you thought it would be a bigger deal. You achieved this huge goal and you don’t know why it’s not as exciting as you thought it would be. This happened to me for years before I realized what was missing, which was finding the ability to feel those feelings for the goals, the things that mattered to me, the happiness, the excitement, feeling love, whether it was love for me or love for other people.
That had to happen in the small ways in order to be able to enjoy it in the big ways. That’s why if you learn how to do it now, learn how to be happy, content and excited with the things that you have right this very moment, then you’re only going to feel exponential happiness and excitement when you get the things that you think are those big things that will cause you to feel that.
I know that this can sound confusing. Read it a couple of times. I’ll give you the how-to. You don’t have to totally understand this for it to start to work in your life. It is fine for you to start practicing this and then chalk all this up to coincidences. It doesn’t matter how you get there. It matters to me that you do get there because you deserve that.
Winning Mindset: Some people may only feel true happiness in the smallest things, and that’s okay. Focus on it and hold that feeling. The more you focus on it, the more of them you will see.
The two things that you need to make sure that you’re going to be in that place to enjoy all the things you want are gratitude for all the little things and feeling those feelings and small little doses that you can. It doesn’t matter how small it is. Some people may only feel true happiness when they have their first sip of coffee. That’s okay. Focus on it. Focus on what that feels like. Hold that feeling. You’ll find that the more you do, the more of them you’re going to see. You’ll find it’s becoming more fun to pursue your goals and enjoy every moment up to it. You’ll find it’s going faster and then all of a sudden, you’ll find you’re there. Here’s to your success.
