Struggling with a lack of trust in yourself or the universe? It’s time to turn it around! In this episode, April Shprintz shares three powerful strategies to help you build trust, achieve your goals, and overcome self-doubt. From playing the “what if” game to focusing on the “what,” not the “how,” you’ll learn how to regain confidence and trust in your ability to succeed. Let’s dive in!
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Trouble Trusting You’ll Get What You Want? Do This!
Understanding Lack Of Trust And Its Impact
I am so glad you are here. When you think that you are not going to get the things that you want, you are often suffering from a lack of trust. Think of a three-year-old who’s trying to get some candy from their parents. They are so certain that’s going to happen right up until the point that it doesn’t, and it’s because they trust themselves. They trust their ability to annoy the hell out of their parents until they get what they want.
I’m kidding. I’m not, but whether that lack of trust is in us, or maybe it’s in a higher power, the universe, whatever it is, we feel disheartened, we can feel lost, and we can feel incapable. If that’s you, I want you to do these three things to turn it around, because having trust that you can do the things that you want to do is a superpower.
The first thing seems super simple, but it works so well. I want you to play the what if game. I used to do this with adults and piss them off because when I was a kid, I would talk about all the time I was going to grow up and be rich. I thought I was going to be George Jefferson from the Jeffersons who moved up to the penthouse.
The Power Of The “What If” Game
I lived in poverty and everyone around me thought that me thinking this was ludicrous, and they would say that people like us don’t do that. People like us don’t graduate college. You have to go to college to make money. People like us this, this, this, and this. I would play the what if game with them, and to this day I still play it with myself, but I’d say things like, “What if I’m different? What if I’m the first person from our family to be rich? What if it’s easier than you think it is?”
If you have a hard time playing the what if game, and I love to do this whenever I need to get my mind into a better place. It doesn’t matter if the things that you are what if are true or could happen or are out there. They get your mind looking for solutions. They get your mind looking at things differently. Seriously, a child can help you do this so much more easily, and I have talked about it before, if you are stuck in traffic and you are angry and you said, “What if my car could sprout wings and go completely to where I need to go without ever interacting with any of these people? What if all these people got off of the highway right now?” Playing the What if game opens up your mind in a different way. It’s like taking a deep breath and seeing things differently.
Focusing On The What, Not The How
The second thing that you can do, focus on the what, not the how. That seems so simple, but it’s not easy because we always want to focus on, “How are we going to do it? I want six pack abs. How am I going to work out? What am I going to do with my diet? I want to do this big thing so how am I going to get started? What are the first five steps?” If you focus on the what, you will be inspired by those steps.
Focus on the what, not the how. Share on XI’m going to go back to when I was a kid because the biggest what that I wanted that everyone said I couldn’t do was to become a news anchor. Luckily, when you are a kid, you have this magical thinking of, “Maybe adults don’t get it and I will figure it out.” Even though they thought I couldn’t do it, I thought, “I’m going to. I don’t know how yet, but I will figure that out.”
What’s interesting is as I told people around me in my world, they would do things to help me. There were teachers at school who got me interviewed on television when I was in the 5th or 6th grade. There were people who encouraged me to do newspapers to call into local TV shows. If you share the what of what you want with people who are successful, people who have done things, sometimes this is not going to be your family and friends, because people who cannot do things that are big and amazing will fear that you can’t do them either. If they don’t want you to get hurt, they are going to try and poo-poo your idea and it is no fun for anyone. It’s not fun for them. It’s not fun for you. Share the what of what you want with other people who’ve done amazing things.
I have said this many times before, I do not take advice from people whose lives I wouldn’t trade. If I wouldn’t go be you for a week, I am not going to listen to your advice. Look for people to share your what with who have done things that you admire and things that you would like to do, and the how will come to you. I promise you. Third thing, I want you to make a list of anywhere from 3 to 5 things that you or others never thought you’d get or accomplish that you did, whether it was you or the people surrounding you.
I can think of three off the top of my head that felt big at the time. They may not in hindsight feel as big, but they felt big then. One was graduate college. No one thought that anyone in our family was going to do it. I have three degrees now, so it doesn’t feel as big of a deal now, but it certainly did then, and the fact that I did that means I can do other things that feel like a big deal.
I have talked about being a news anchor. Everyone said I couldn’t do it. I anchored television news to an audience of 75 million, that was at the time a big thing, and it happened relatively easily. Having a successful company. When I left the corporate world and had such a successful sales career, I know people thought I was crazy and going to fail. Yet my company has been growing every year, and those are the big ones.
You can do way more than you believe you can. Share on XSometimes the little ones are more impactful to me like I have run a marathon. If you’ve ever seen me run, you’ll understand why this is so surprising to people, but things like that you didn’t think you could do, reminding yourself. You may start with a list of 3 to 5 things and end up with 10 to 20, and that’s wonderful because that’s opening your mind and telling your unconscious, “I can do way more than I believe I can.”
I have got a bonus one for you. I said I had three. I have got one more, and this is to keep promises to you from you. Little promises that you are going to get more sleep, drink more water, going to spend more time with friends or family, whatever they are. You don’t have to do this 100% of the time. Being consistent is not getting it right every day.
Aim for 80% like the 80/20 rule. If 80% of the time you are keeping your word to yourself every single time you are building your confidence and you are going to get to the place where you know you can trust that you’ll get what you want because you trust you and you trust that you have been able to make things happen for yourself all along. Even if you’ve been taking it for granted and not yet paying attention. I can’t wait to hear how this works out for you. Here’s to your success.
