Plenty of self-imposed obstacles can make it really hard to develop a winning mindset, including this one: Judgement. We all tend to judge situations, people, ourselves. That’s a problem. A judgmental attitude puts limits on so many wonderful things in our lives. It can really hold you back as you seek to develop a strong mindset. So what attitude should you have instead? An attitude of curiosity. Observe the world through the lens of curiosity, not judgement. If you want to hear an intriguing real-life story with an important lesson about this idea, tune in now to episode 25 of the Winning Mindset Mastery Podcast!
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Ever Seen A Bully in Action? SAVE Yourself, Use This Ted Lasso Trick
One of the things I find can make it difficult for folks who are working on their mindset early on is our tendency to have judgment about things and people and ourselves. If you are moving from having a mindset where you think that lots of things aren’t possible for you to a mindset that they are, you often judge whether or not that’s possible for you, and you put limits on yourself with that judgment.
The interesting thing about judgment is it puts limits on so many things in our lives. The best piece of advice I have ever received is someone encouraging me to always look at things with curiosity instead of judgment because judgment is, “No. That can’t happen. That’s not possible. We can’t do it,” where curiosity is, “I wonder if we could. I wonder how we would make that happen. I wonder what we need in order to succeed at that.”
Judgment puts limits on so many things in our lives. Always look at things with curiosity instead of judgment. Share on XThe best example I have ever seen of how curiosity opens up the world to you over judgment and can prevent you from making yourself look like an idiot is in Ted Lasso, the first season in episode eight. It’s a great show about mindset all across the board, but this particular scene was epic. It is a dart-throwing scene.
For those of you who don’t know anything about Ted Lasso, he is an American football coach who gets recruited over to London to coach what we would call a soccer team or an English football team. He is this happy-go-lucky, super mindset-oriented person that everyone thinks there is no way this guy is going to do a great job and he does. In this particular scene, he is with the owner of the football team and her ex-husband, who is a bully, and he’s one of those guys that always wants to throw his weight around.
He is harassing his ex-wife about how they are going to do things because he still owns half of the team. What was interesting is that in this particular scene, he bets Ted, who he thinks is this hokey hillbilly from the middle of the US. He bets him on a game of darts his half of the team. It goes, “Ted, do you like darts?” Ted goes, “They are okay,” and then he makes the bet.
“I will bet you my half of the team against Rebecca’s half of the team on this game of darts.” They start playing. As they are playing, the ex-husband, Rupert was his name, is talking, showboating, and all those things and Ted continues to play. As they get towards the end of the game, the clutch few darts that you are throwing, Ted says, “Guys like you have underestimated me my entire life. They always thought I was some hokey hillbilly or what have you.” I’m not quoting this directly. “It used to bother me. I realized that it gave me an advantage if they had been curious about me instead of judging me, they would have had a much different experience.
Curiosity: Ted Lasso says, “Guys like you have underestimated me my entire life. They always thought I was some hokey hillbilly or what have you. It used to bother me. I realized that it gave me an advantage. If they had been curious about me instead of judging me, they would have had a much different experience.”
As he’s saying this, he’s starting to hit those last three crucial shots to win the game. He says, “The one thing you could have asked is, ‘Ted, have you ever played darts before?’” and he throws a shot and hits it. “I would have told you, ‘Yes, every week for X amount of years with my dad.’” He proceeds to tell him other questions that he would have asked about him if he was curious instead of judgmental while he makes the last two winning shots and wins the other half of the team.
It is an epic scene. It is so worth going and watching. If you Google Ted Lasso’s dart scene, you don’t even have to see the episode. It’s such an excellent example of the way that things open up to you when you are curious about something versus judgment. This works whether it’s something that you want to do in your life or your business or if you have someone or something that you don’t know that much about.
Curiosity: Ted Lasso’s dart scene is an excellent example of the way that things open up to you when you are curious about something versus being judgmental.
A lot of times, when we are ignorant about something or we haven’t been exposed to or learned about it, we tend to snap to judgments, or maybe we have been taught judgments by our family or friends and we have picked them up. If you approach those same things with curiosity, what can I learn? What can I understand? You may still not agree, but you will come at it in a place that allows you to have much more success, much more peace, and much more happiness.
Curiosity: If you approach things with curiosity, you will come at them from a place that allows you to have much more success, peace, and happiness.
I encourage you to try this the next time you feel yourself judging something, and you will know when you are judging something because you have got a black or white view of it. It’s yes or no. You know the answer, but you are not exploring it. I want you to apply this method of curiosity and start asking open-ended questions to learn more.
At least three. Three is enough. If you have an amazing experience, don’t forget, you can always share it with me. Go to the website for the show WinningMindsetMasteryPodcast.com. At the very bottom of the page is a place for us to have a personal two-way conversation privately in our voices, with you sending that through Ask April. I would love to hear about it. Here’s to your success.