One can significantly improve their personal relationships just with a simple mindset shift. April Shprintz offers three practical tips on how to level up your relationship with your significant other.
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3 Tips To Radically Improve Your Relationship
I’m so glad you’re here. A lot of times we are talking about how to be more successful in your life, how to be happier in your life, and how to do better in your job or your business. What I don’t often touch on is how much mindset can help in your personal relationships. In this episode, I’m going to be talking about your relationship with your significant other and how you can make that even better using your mindset.
Setting Intentions
The first tip is about setting intentions. I had this come up completely out of the blue when someone jokingly asked me what my intentions were with someone. While it was a joke, I thought how incredible to put all your intentions out there. All those good things that you want to do in your relationship for that person, who you want to be, how you want to show up, and how you want to positively impact their life. You can do intentions in any relationship.
If you think about it with your significant other, how often are we a little bit in default? We’re just doing what we do, but we’re not thinking, “This is what I want for you. This is what I want for us.” Taking the time to write out those intentions or say those intentions or even more powerfully share those intentions can be incredible. Not only is it an incredible experience for you, but it’s an incredible thing for your significant other to receive from you.
Taking Cues
The second one is so simple, and it is a very quick and small reframe, but the impact it can have on your relationship is phenomenal. One of the things that we tend to do just as people, whether you’re someone who has a great mindset or someone who struggles with your mindset, is take certain cues as a negative indicator. Let’s say, for example, your significant other doesn’t show up on time to an event that’s important to you. You might take that to mean, “So-and-so doesn’t love me. They didn’t show up.” The reframe is instead of looking for reasons they aren’t showing up for you, that they don’t love you.
I want you to reinforce all the reasons that they do. For example, she got me coffee this morning. She loves me. They went out of their way to go to my favorite store to get my favorite dessert. They love me. He fixed that thing that was bothering me in the garage. He loves me. He took time to send me a text this morning to wish me good luck on my presentation. She is spending time with me at a sporting event with my friends that I know she has no interest in. She loves me. They are telling me how important I am to them completely out of the blue. They love me.
All of these different things that people can do, some of them ordinary, some of them a little out of the ordinary and taking a lot more effort but all signs of how someone loves you. Even someone working extra hours to do things to get further in their career to take care of the family. There are so many things that we do for each other that we’re doing out of love. Focusing on it that way will help you reinforce how much your partner cares about you and how much they love you. You don’t have to change anything else in your relationship. The way that you’re looking at this and your relationship will be significantly better in as little as a week.
Benefit Of The Doubt
The third one, and I love this one. I use this reframe all the time, but it belongs here in relationships. Always give your partner the benefit of the doubt. If there is a bad way to take a comment and a good way to take a comment, ladies, I’m talking to you. Take it the good way. Assume that that’s how they meant it.
Give them the benefit of the doubt. If you don’t know why something happened a certain way or some situation transpired how it did, assume that your partner has a good reason. As soon as you know, it’ll make sense. This could be as simple as they show up an hour late for dinner and you assume they are probably saving someone’s life on the side of the road because that’s how they are. Doing this is a benefit to your partnership because you’re always giving them the benefit of the doubt, but it is also a benefit to you.
If you don’t know why something has happened in a certain way or how some situation transpired, always assume that your partner has a good reason for it. Share on XIf they don’t have a good reason, you will still find that out, and you won’t have worked yourself up into a tizzy for an hour when you were waiting for them and they were late, which might make you overreact to the reason. Even if it wasn’t a good reason because we all make mistakes. At the end of the day, we all want to be giving each other grace. We want grace and we want to give grace.
Closing Words
These three things, you will see modeled in the relationships that you are the most enamored with. In the relationships that you most think, “What a great partnership they have.” It is very easy to start doing it on your side and modeling it for your partner. They will end up doing these things too even if you don’t tell them. Give this a try. Give it a week. As I said, you will feel like you have a different relationship. It’s a gift you give yourself and your partner. It makes you an even stronger unit. Try it out. Here’s to your success.